Showing posts with label The Girls. Show all posts
Showing posts with label The Girls. Show all posts

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Sticky Fingers, Livi

Yesterday we went school shopping at the Mills. With four kids? Yes, I'm daring like that. By yourself? Yes, I'm crazy like that.  We hit 5 stores, the food court, and then the play area and pet store too for good measure. Trips like this always begin with a good "talking to" in the van on the way there. It's more like manifesting destiny for me--if I say it, it will be true.

The "talking to" goes like this:
Well, girls, lets have fun today! We are going to do TONS of shopping. You need to stick by me so I don't lose you in the store. I would be very sad and cry if I lost you forever. Please don't whine, complain, fight or cry. If I hear anything like that we will do an about face in the store and go home. We won't be buying anything if that happens. Let's try to get the most for our money, look for signs that say sale! We don't want to waste our money! Ready for some fun? Okay team, BREAK!  (I say that last part in my head)

The shopping trip went well. I got shoes for all the girls and an outfit for each of them.  But somewhere something went awry. We were standing in line for what passes as Chinese food when something caught my eye in the bottom of the stroller. It was a cute little denim skirt that I had shown to Olivia in H&M. We didn't buy anything there, just browsed around with the intention of buying. 

But here was the skirt.

Excuse me, I said to the teen behind the counter. We need to make a return.

Livi, did you put this skirt in our stroller?

Yes! She said

You can't do that, Livi. That's stealing! We have to pay for things we want from the store! Do you want mommy to go to jail? I half expected her to say yes, because she says stuff like that now that she is a sassy four year old.   (Looking back, I think I was a bit harsh. I was embarrassed.  Jordan--cautious and sensitive child that she is was on the verge of tears. Ava--was busy admonishing Livi too. And Livi was a little stunned because I know she didn't intentionally try to steal that skirt. It was just a little mishap.) But I had to take the skirt  back and I figured it was a teachable moment.

When we walked into the store, there was no employee in sight. Great, I thought, they are scouring their video footage in the back trying to I.D. the shoplifting mother. Finally I found someone on the Grown Up side of the store. I approached her with my remorseful looking brood (you have never seen so many puppy dog eyes). 

I could have just walked back into the empty store, returned the skirt to its rack and gone back out, but this seemed too easy.  Shouldn't being caught stealing be less anti climactic than that?  I literally had to scour the store to find an employee to play a role in this cautionary tale. And when I did find her, I wasn't even sure what to do. This was a weird moment for me. What exactly do you say when your four year old unintentionally shop lifts? I don't even remember what I said but it was awkward. The clerk was caught by surprise too, but she was quite forgiving and played along with my idea about the "teachable moment." She accepted Olivia's sheepish apology and added an admonishment about getting in trouble with the police or some such. Olivia promised to never ever do it again, as did the other girls.

Glad that THAT unpleasantness was over, it was off to lunch where the memory of sticky fingers Livi was quickly replaced by sticky fingers of another variety, the kind that wet wipes can easily fix.

...mm mm...fake Chinese food.

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Helping Hands and High Fives

The wheels have been turning around here as we begin to switch gears into a new (and hectic) back to school routine.   I had a light bulb moment a couple of weeks ago around the time that the girls were complaining that "we never have fun" and "we're bored."  We can't have fun around here because I have too much on my to-do list.  Now, normally I would say...put down the to-do list and play with the kids! Get outside and enjoy the fleeting Summer sunshine. The thing is, when I put down the to-do list the house turns to shambles...not just a couple of dust bunnies here and there. I mean comes-to-a-screeching-halt kind of shambles like: we can't eat dinner because there isn't any silver wear clean and mom I'm down to my last pair of clean underwear.  I don't like to see the house get to this point, the truth is, that if I'm not doing a load of laundry a day, running the dishwasher and picking up stray toys and dirty clothes then it seems like within 8 hours we are well on our way to the gears jamming around here.

SO on to my light bulb moment.  Why am I trying to do it all myself?  Jim has a few jobs around the house reserved for him, but he works many days well into the evening hours and many Saturdays too, so when he isn't here to lend a hand, all the household chores fall on me.  The kids pick up toys but I consider myself lucky if they get through it without an ever persistent whining and alternate threats and raised voice warnings on my end.  Many times I find myself saying...it just faster/easier/better when I do it myself, but I'm beginning to wonder if that's true?

Growing up we always had chores to do around the house, in fact we had a full blown chart/calendar that we followed to a T--we even had our own "off" day built in, where we could relax and slack off for the whole day.  The thing is, I always thought of myself as a teenager following this particular chore chart. Before my teenage years I have vague memories of a sticker star chart and clear memories of my Mom asking/pleading/bribing/threatening/yelling while I lounged lazily among an ankle deep wading pool of toys and whined.  (I feel like I am right in the middle of those days right now, but the roles are reversed).  I can't really remember when/how I learned how to do chores.  At some point I went  from shoving toys under my bed in one fell swoop, to washing and drying dishes and vacuuming and taking out the garbage on a regular basis. 

I was reading a few blogs last week and came across this post over at The Happy Housewife.  I thought, wait a minute! I have a 4 year old, 5 year old, and 7 year old. and I never thought to even attempt to ask them to do half the chores on this list!  Could my 4 year old pull clothes out of the dryer? Could my 5 wipe down the sinks? Could my 7 year old vacuum? There was only one way to find out!

I set about creating a list of chores that my girls would be responsible for each day and I told them that those 6 things would be their daily contribution to running the household: Making their bed, getting their dirty clothes to the hamper, picking up and putting away toys, setting and clearing the table for meals, and putting clean folded clothes in their drawers.  Then I creating a long list of extras. These I called Helping Hands. I won't list them all but here are a few: Feed the dog, Help with meal prep, Unload the dishwasher, Dust.  Every time they complete a Helping Hand from this list they are given a token called a High Five that is worth 5 minutes of computer time (they LOVE to play on the computer).  When they have accumulated at least 15 minutes they can cash out. We are in the development stage of this reward system. As we progress I think I will add other rewards that they can "buy". I'm thinking they can "buy" a meal out, or "buy" some extra time to stay up, or "buy" a day off from chores, or cash out at the end of the week for a small allowance etc.  I have to think it through some more.

So far, so great.  The girls have really surprised me with their enthusiasm! We'll see how it's going in a month! HA!

Monday, March 28, 2011

Sweet Dreams are Made of This

Just a few minutes ago my ears perked up as I listened to Jordan singing that Annie Lennox song as it was on the radio.  She didn't see me looking at her--she was too busy drawing pictures at the kitchen table.  I watched her for a few seconds and smiled.  I had a strangely nostalgic sense of myself back in 1984 singing "Sweet dreams are made of this, who am I to disagree?..."  Although I was surely singing "sweet dreams are made of THESE" not "this" because that lyric sounds like "these" to me.  Not the point.  I was seven in 1984. Jordan is seven right now.   I am so struck by the idea that this song pulled me backward and forward at the same time.  All these life-comes-full-circle kinds of thoughts come swirling. 

Like when Jordan says she wants to be a singer or an actress when she grows up. I said the same thing.

Like when the girls play with their Barbies and turn it into drama central by pretending cat fights, domestic turmoil, gossip mill, fashion show craziness. My husband thinks they are nutty. But my sisters and I played the same way with  Barbie, her clones, and her frenemies.

Like when I showed the girls how we would make little "dolls" out of rose of sharon buds and flowers in the Summertime. And they would try to make them too.

Like when they came running to me with a bottle of "potion" they made out of water, soap bubbles, and flower petals. One of our favorite ways to spend an afternoon imagining.

Like when I soap up Livi's hair in the bath and slick it straight up like a unicorn horn--the way that my mom used to do for us.

Thanks to a barbie guitar and a "Girls just wanna have fun" cover by Miley Cyrus my girls can sing at the top of their lungs: "The phone rings... in the middle of the night..." the way that we would.

The past and present magically mingle.  Sometimes the girls will share an idea or say something that I distinctly remember having or thinking in my youth.

I never thought I'd want to relive the 1980's.  I imagined neon pink hair, leggings, jelly bracelets, and stone washed denim making a comeback, and I would shudder--I didn't realize that my 1980's childhood might revisit.  I have four little time machines that take me back there quite often and Sweet Dreams ARE made of this.

Saturday, February 19, 2011

Taste of Spring Pictures

We got a new toy in the beginning of the month.  We had been camera-less for 8 months. Our old camera went on the fritz right after Chloe was born, so all of her new born pics are taken with my phone, leaving much to be desired.

We had a freak warm up over the last few days (which Ava and I did not enjoy much because we were trapped in a hospital room). But yesterday when the girls asked to go outside I choked down the initial urge to say NO and headed out with them.  It wasn't as muddy as I expected and even though the yard is a mess and everywhere I looked, I saw work-work-work,  I just shut it all out of my mind and enjoyed the moment. It was easy to do when I paired my vision down behind the viewfinder of our new camera. 

Here are some of my favorite shots from yesterday--our first real outdoor play time of 2011:















These are straight from the camera. Some day I will learn all about fancy editing and what not. But I'm pretty happy with these and very happy to not be snapping shots with my smart phone. Chloe was napping and that's why she is obviously absent from the pictures. And of course, I was BEHIND the camera (which I don't mind because I was still in Pajamas--I had been cleaning and laundering up to the point the girls asked to go out)

I'm ready for spring! How about you?

Friday, December 31, 2010

In 2010

In 2010: I've loved my husband a little more each day--his strength, his sillyness, his committment, his care. I got to witness his care for his family.  He is so happy to be in this new house and it is a home because he is here with me.  I've watched him love his girls the best way he knows how. I have watched him cuddle his youngest and wrestle his older girls (I always think of a pack of puppies when I watch them play). I've enjoyed, TOO FEW, date nights and I resolve to make more time for us in the new year.  I look forward to the completion of many home projects and lots of laughs and memories made!

In 2010: I've watched Jordan shoot up before my eyes into a pretty little lady inside and out. I see her love of books and writing blooming and it makes me so proud when I see her busy at the table with a pen and paper in hand.  She is so bright.  Kind and loving in many ways. My girlie girl.  I found a list of what she wants to be when she grows up: 1. A puppy washer 2. A singer 3. A salon person 4. A fashion designer 5. A ballerina 6. A cheerleader.  I see the seeds of all of these things in her and more.

In 2010: I've watched Ava live life to the fullest--playing hard, laughing hard, fighting and loving. She goes full tilt in everything she does.  She's wacky and silly and sweet and funny and a good big sister and a complete rascal at the same time.  Ava throws caution to the wind. Takes chances. Lives. I hope she never looses her spark and fire.

In 2010: I've watched Livi, my baby, a baby no more, take on the role of big sister. She fills my days with kisses and hugs. I look into her deep brown eyes and my heart melts. My sensitive little mini. I watch her trail her big sisters wanting to do and to be. I watch her kiss her little sister's face and hands. She is adorable in every way. She goes with the flow of our days without complaint.  She is and always was the one who waits and watches and I hope what she sees is love.

In 2010: I watched a new little life emerge: Chloe completes our family--a little babbling brook. She is quick to show off her dimples and when I see her, I see my husband. It's no mistake that her favorite string of sounds right now is "dadadadadada." The way she lights up when she sees him and he does the same? She is Daddy's girl through and through.  She is my sweet little baby and always will be. So I will hold on to her. Watch her closely when she sleeps, hold her closely when she is awake. She is my happy hearted sweetie bean.

When I loosened my grip on the sorrows of 2009, I had no idea the blessings in store for this year. Thank you Lord for my family and a wonderful 2010.  And HAPPY NEW YEAR one and all!

Friday, December 24, 2010

What Little Girls Are Made of...

Another mommy blog I happened across today conducted this interview with her daughter and it reminded me that I did this same interview a couple of years ago. I thought it might be fun to revisit the little exercise so I copied this from a Facebook Note I wrote two years ago. I've been in the mood to love up my little ones this morning and this note makes me smile.  The only addition I made to it is that I asked Olivia the questions (she is now 3). It is interesting to see how her answers compare to 3 year old Ava Answers!

You can join in the fun too:  Copy the questions, ask your kid the questions and write them down exactly how they respond. Link  back in the comments if you have done this, I'd love to hear the answers.

I am asking Jordan these questions (When she was 5) and already impatient with me!

I also asked Ava (When she was 3) and she was reluctant too!

I asked Olivia (Who is currently 3).

This interview was conducted on Sunday, March 15, 2009 at 3pm (with Olivia's Additions added today 12/23/2010 at 10:34am)



1. What is something I always say to you?

J: Uh....Girly's be quiet in the morning.

A: I love you.

O: Livi, it's lunch time!



2. What makes me happy?

J: When we be good.

A: When I snuggle you and Kiss you.

O: Um, Mommy I love you.



3. What makes me sad?

J: If we don't listen.

A: If you make me shout to you.

O: Mommy, I don't like you.



4. How do I make you laugh?

J: If you call us "skweeber bird" or "Jordie bug".

A: Um...If you say a funny joke.

O: Um...Said "I Love you" and I said hahahahahaha.



5. What do you think I was like as a child?

J: You doing um....I don't know....I don't know what my answer would be...um...listening to your parents very good.

A: I think a barbie.

O: Um...a bunny?



6. How old am I?

J: ummm *tapping her cheek with her finger* 96?

A: UH...I don't know.

O: I don't know!



7. How tall am I?

J: um....as taller than us.

A: Uh this tall *Shows me with her thumb and pointer*

O: taller than Jordan.



8. What is my favorite thing to do?

J: Uh....watch us be good.

A: uh...uh...doing the dishes?

O: Clean Up.



9. What do I do when you're not around?

J: Uh...sit down and watch TV.

A: Uh...Just have to keep on looking.

O: Um Say, Move out of the way sweet heart.



10. If I become famous, what will it be for?

J: when are we done? um...making the greatest pictures.

A: For a fashion show.

O: mmmm...Butterflies?



11. What am I really good at?

J: Um...Being a good mom.

A: Uh...doing yoga poses.

O: Clean up.



12. What am I not really good at?

J: Um...trying to be the best runner than daddy.

A: oh...I don't know...just tell me.

O: Clean up Kingston's poopy.  (That's our dog, by the way.)



13. What is my job?

J: um...to keep the house clean.

A: uh...read a book.

O: I don't know!  Clean up?



14. What is my favorite food?

J: Um...Salmon.

A: is it pasta?

O: Spaghettios. 



15. What makes you proud of me?

J: by taking care of us.

A: If I go pee on the potty.

O: Clean up!



16. If I were a cartoon character, who would I be?

J: Um...I don't know...Sandy from Spongebob?

A: A fashion model.

O: A Princess!



17. What do you and I do together?

J: Play with each other.

A: Make a happy valentine.

O: Clean up.



18. How are we the same?

J: By loving each other the same way.

A: Just tell me.

O: We have brown hair and brown eyes, the same nose, the same mouth, and the same head. Do we have the same head, momma?



19. How are you and I different?

J: From doing the different sports and we like different things.

A: We are wearing different clothes.

O: I don't know.



20. How do you know that I love you?

J: Giving hugs and kisses

A: Because I said you're the best mommy in the whole wide world.

O: cause I look like a princess.



21. Where is my favorite place to go?

J: To the grocery store.

A: Uh...to church.
 
O: To the eagle's nest. (that's the child care center at our grocery store)
 
I can't wait to do this again with Chloe in a couple of years!
 

Thursday, December 23, 2010

The Reason You Didn't Get a Christmas Card From My Family

Merry Christmas, Friends. And Happy New Year Too!

I hate that I didn't do Christmas Cards this year. I do love getting Christmas Cards and I had the best of intentions (but you know what they say about those).  I could have gone out and purchased a box, but I wanted to do a card with a picture and then there's the problem of a camera that hasn't been working for quite some time. I feel so bad for little Chloe...all of her baby pictures are being taken with my phone which for a phone are decent quality, but for printing purposes are barely sufficient--no where near Christmas Card sufficient.

Anyway, here's a Happy Holiday shot for you.  With love from our family to yours!



Also wanted to share this little photo shoot of Chloe. The girls fashioned her with a little veil (Jordan's lovie "Blankie") and a sparkly head band and they were calling her "Little Mary." She was of course loving the attention lavished on her by her sisters as she jumped her day away in the Jump-a-roo (I love this toy by the way. Jumping babies are just way too cute for words.) I ask you, what is cuter than a 7 month old "Little Mary" jumping in a Jump-a-roo? Nothing.  The pics are proof!!!



You see how bad these pics are right?  Phone pics.  She was 300 times cuter in person.  Sigh. Santa, do you hear me?

Enjoy all of your holiday festivities!  I will be doing the same with my family--can't wait to see everyone!!!

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Weekend Re-Cap

We did some Mommy/Daughter/Sister bonding today.  Jim had plans to help a friend this weekend and took a little road trip today which left me a whole day with the girls. I wanted to do something fun. We've been wanting to see Tangled so I decided to leave the baby with Pappy and take the older three to the movies. The girls have only been a couple of times before and it was actually Livi's first time. My mom and one of my sisters decided to come as well. 

The movie is really cute. I think it's at the top of my list of Disney pics. The girls were totally enthralled. We saw it in 3D which made it even more mesmorizing.  After the movie we picked up some dinner and went back to my parents, caught the end of the football game, smothered Chloe in kisses, and popped in another movie. 

As I type this Ava is sleeping beside me on the couch. Livi and Chloe are in dreamland upstairs and Jordan is STILL awake.  We are having a "sleepover" which I guess just means that we are staying up late and the girls will get to sleep in my room. They were super excited about that. Usually I'm begging them to stay in their own beds, so they recognize the golden opportunity for what it is! 

Thanksgiving break is almost over. One more day to sleep in and then it's back to the old routine. It's fine with me.  Actually it won't be back to the old routine completely, because Jim and I are "getting fit" together.  He does a "biggest loser" type thing with the guys at work with cash as a motivating factor. I'm just tired of feeling tired.  I feel old, flabby and I'm scared to go to the doctor for a physical. I really need to whip myself into shape.  Sigh. 

Well...back to the sleepover!  :)

Saturday, July 10, 2010

A Wonderful Weekend, or…?

So Jim is away this weekend…he just left this morning for his yearly golf outing with his best bud and my Uncle and Cousins.  It’s an overnight thing, so it will be the first time that I am all alone with the girls for more than 24 hours.  I think we’ll be okay because it won’t be much different from when he is home…but I know there is a period of time during the weekend when I will be exhausted and ready for him to come home.  I handle most, not all, of the child rearing duties anyway so I know that won’t be overwhelming to me, but I need that adult contact, the daily support of my husband, and the break that nightly “wrestle fest” (Yes, we have those even in an all girl house!) with dad provides.

I’m trying to keep a positive attitude…planning fun things for the girls and I to do. And I’m sure the weekend will fly by.

In other news, I tried to get on the treadmill yesterday morning. Our treadmill is in the basement so I took all of the girls down there with me. I’d like to say that everything went smoothly for the 40 minutes that I was plugging away down there, but it was frustrating.

We have toys and stuff down there so there should be plenty to keep the girls occupied, but they still found a way to grate on my nerves…the problem really isn’t the girls, it’s me, tied to the treadmill.  Of course Olivia had to go to the bathroom and wouldn’t go upstairs by herself, so I had to argue with Jordan to go up with her…Then Ava and Jordan wanted to play with Bratz dolls so I gave them permission to go upstairs and get a few, but 10 minutes later they still weren’t back. I’m having visions of overflowing toilets, spilled juice, crayon marks on walls, a hurricane blowing through the playroom that I just straightened, and/or cuts and bruises requiring first aid. All the while, I’m screaming my head off so that my voice will carry to the upstairs and huffing and puffing on the treadmill at the same time…”Here we are, Mom!” 15 minutes later…”What took so long?”  “Well we had to dress our dolls!” Gah!  Just get down here where I can see you!!! Also, Miss Chloe was well behaved…she did sleep through most of the workout but had to have Passy reinserted twice. I made Jordan do it and she pouted because “why do I have to do EVERYTHING?” Uh…maybe  because it’s hard for mommy to do everything and walk/jog at the same time.

I made it through the workout, but I know the novelty of following mom to the basement is going to wear off in a New York Minute and then I’m going to be stressed out wondering what everyone is up to while I’m working out. This is not the kind of “sweat” I want to build. Seriously my blood pressure boiled a couple of times during this first work out…There has to be a better way…short of locking them all up in a soundproof booth.

Monday, May 10, 2010

I Painted My Nails For Mother's Day

The last time I painted my nails was about 2 weeks ago, before that it had been almost 8 years ago when I did my nails for my wedding...and I don't know if it really counts because I had them done at a nail salon and they were acrylics...

I usually paint my toenails in the summer time...but I had a big toe injury weeks ago and my toenail on my right big toe is now missing (it's so gross looking...although it has gotten a little better. It's going to take SOOO long to grow back.  No big toenail for sandal season...and it doesn't help that flip flops are the only shoes my puffy pregnant feet actually enjoy) ...plus, I can't reach my toes comfortably now AND I can't really see my toes at this point either. On a side note, when I was pregnant the first or second time, my little sister Lindsey treated me to a home pedicure. She helped me soak and scrub my feet and she painted my toes for me.  It was the BEST. I recommend that if you know a woman who is very pregnant at the height of sandal season that you do this for her...if you're queasy about touching toes then send her to a salon to have it done...really it was one of the most thoughtful things anyone has done for me and I loved it so much because I couldn't do it for myself without strange contortions and much pain...

Anyway, I never paint my fingernails. I'm a nail biter.  Really a nibbler. I don't bite my nails down to unattractive nubs but they are fairly short.  I usually nibble when I am bored.  Usually in front of the TV. I don't really think about it...when my mind is wondering my nails go to my mouth.  I hate this habit of mine.  It annoys me more when my husband points it out to me.  I usually think, "I'm doing it 'cause I'm bored...so instead of pointing it out, let's DO something!!"  But I don't say that aloud.  I just get annoyed.  

So, I've been super busy the last few weeks.  Too busy to watch too much TV and too busy to bite my nails. and they actually look kind of nice right now! I don't want long nails, they just get in the way, but I like the length they are now.  My prenatal vitamin has helped them grow strong and being too busy to nibble has made up for the missing toenail--kind of.

My friend Melissa gave me a little bottle of Barbie Pink polish shortly after Valentine's day...very thoughtful of her.  I painted my toes with it right away and the girls' fingers too!  Well, when the nails started to grow I pulled out that Barbie Pink and went to town. I felt pretty and if you know Barbie Pink--you know that it's a flashy little color--perfect for toes, but perfect for mommy's fingers too! I thought well, maybe it would pull attention from the gnarled toe down there...the one that had a Barbie band aid on it for a week or so.

On Saturday night I decided that I would give the girls mani/pedies.  (I never clip their toenails and fingernails and they were pretty ragged--I'm a bad mom).  So I pulled out the nail clippers and files and the nail polish and everybody got fancied up for Mother's day.  I painted my fingernails too!  I chose a more neutral color.   I felt pampered a little bit.

It's funny how something so little that takes about 5 minutes to do for yourself can make you feel so good.  Mommy's worth it...I recommend painting your fingers or your toes OR both today!  It's something for YOU to enjoy and smile at every time you look at them.

Granted the girls have already chipped their polish, but I know the memories of these little beauty things we do together will stay with them all their lives.  They get so excited whenever I suggest anything like this--painted nails,  new hairstyles, a little lip gloss, even smearing smelly lotion on their hands or legs...anything "girly" they love...and I know they love it more when Mommy does it with them.  One of the many reasons that I do adore having little girls.

Friday, April 30, 2010

Personality Plus

I get such a kick out of seeing my little girls grow up.  They are three little girls growing up in the same house, with the same parents, and the same rules and they couldn't be more different from each other! Each has her own "look". I suppose when we pose for a family picture you can see the resemblances. My husband has a more fair complexion complete with reddish brown facial hair, hazel eyes, and freckles and I have olive skin and VERY dark hair and eyes.  And our girls have one or more of our traits but the mold is definitely broken after each one! :) I'm so excited to add a new little princess to our court and I am daydreaming regularly about what she will look like.  The girls have been doing that too, they each want her to look like them!

Even in temperament and personality they are so different from each other. To illustrate: This morning on our way out the door to take Jordan to school I noticed that we'd left the house without her book bag. Off-handedly, I said "Jordan, what about your book bag?" She was half way to the car and turned to come back up the steps. We had plenty of time this morning so I wasn't too annoyed about having to go back into the house to retrieve it, BUT I got a little scattered thinking about grabbing the bag before the burglar alarm would be armed.  I opened the door, grabbed the bag and never once thought about the dog escaping, just as I was grabbing, he was running--out the front door, off the porch, down the steps, and across the street.  In the first seconds of this morning madness I couldn't help noticing my little girls and really watching the differences in their reactions to this unexpected occurrence.  I had a feeling that the dopey dog wouldn't go far, but he was very excited about the new front yard stimulus and the wind of freedom blowing through his ears and that's why he wasn't listening as I commanded him to come back.  Here's what the girls were up to: Jordan immediately began apologizing. Ever the people pleaser, she was convinced that had she not forgotten her bag, or if she had only raced up the front steps to shut the front door the dog wouldn't be roaming the block freely.  Ava stood on the sidewalk shouting at the top of her lungs "KINGSTON! GET BACK HERE!"  Take charge Ava would not have this doggy disobedience.  Livi was standing on the steps, stunned and crying. I'm sure the thought of Kingston never returning was too much for her little noggin to handle.  Pathetically frozen, and heart broken, the tears were flowing freely. "It's not your fault, Jordan. Ava, get into the car and get buckled. Mommy will handle this. It's okay, Livi, Mommy will get Kingston back." I wrangled him back to the front porch in less than 60 seconds.  But just as my foot hit our front step the alarm began to scream.  GREAT! I let the dog's collar go so I could disarm the ear bleeding screech (second time this week it's gone off!) Kingston was off again! But this time I coaxed him into the van and he got to ride with us to school. Fun for all!! Except now I've got Boxer fluff all over the passenger seat. Oh well. 

Such is the life of a 8 month pregnant, stay at home mom with three little girls, and a lovable boxer who only listens sometimes.

I just keep thinking about the girls reactions. It could have a little to do with their ages but I think their responses are so typically them and it's interesting.

Slightly off topic, but too cute not to share, I took a video of Olivia last night (she didn't know I was filming her, which makes it all the more priceless) after dinner. It's another glimpse at her personality which is so lovable, huggable, and randomly kissable.  ENJOY!



Saturday, April 17, 2010

An Awakening

Let me share something with you:  A quarter pound worth of chocolate Easter cross after 10pm + An episode of 20/20 about a creepy, murderous kidnapper = THE worst nightmare of my life.   Couple that with the fact that I am rolling through my 8th month of pregnancy (when dreams are at their most vivid) and it is a complete disaster.

I know better...but I like to have a snack before bed...we ate a late dinner, so I HAD to wait until around 10:30pm to eat it. Besides, Jim had nodded off on the couch and I was bored.  

I thought maybe the chocolate would keep me up, but I didn't have any trouble falling to sleep. Since I started Flying at Flylady.com, my days have been full and productive and I have definitely been tired by the time bed time rolls around.

The dream started off innocently enough with me heading off to a late night appointment at the hairdresser (My Aunt)...For some reason her salon was more like a doctor's office than a salon, but I thought nothing of it as I was asked by the receptionist to give a urine specimen. She handed me a small cup and off I trotted to the bathroom and when I was heading back I was walking through a semi crowded Mall Court.  I was trying to hurry with my eyes glued to my capless specimen so that it wouldn't spill. All of a sudden Jordan and Ava were trailing behind me.  I got that "mommy feeling of dread" as I was trying to prod the girls to move in front of me so I could see them, wishing like hell that I had eyes in the back of my head, or at least that I could dump the stupid pee cup that I was balancing.  To top it off I had to stop at the ATM machine!  I could hear the girls gabbing and fighting behind me as I made my necessary transaction trying to speed things up. Just as I finished up there, I turned around and the girls had vanished! Panic set in as I scoured the mall court. I began shouting for the girls hoping that they were only hiding somewhere, playing some kind of game with me.  But they never reappeared. Frantic, I rushed back to the salon where my Dad and Aunt were waiting for me. I hurriedly told them that the girls were missing. A search began. I remember viewing a video of my MAC transaction that had been taken. The grainy black and white surveillance showed my annoyed face, pinched sourly as I punched buttons on the machine.  The girls dresses flitted in the background but you couldn't see their faces. One minute they were there and the next they were gone.  I visualized some creeper luring them away. 

No one told me that they were gone for good, but I knew.  At the end of the dream, Jim was with me, driving me home in a convertible. I could tell he was super angry with me.  I felt SOOOO guilty. In my dream, as we drove through the city with the top down, I began to wail and scream and cry out my guilt.  Asking WHY? Screaming for God to intervene. For my babies to come back.  It all felt very futile and very real.

At 4:20am, I awoke.  My chest was heaving.  I was having what felt like a panic attack (although I've never had one of those before). Jim jostled awake, "What's the matter?" "I had a...horrible dream." "The baby is fine. You said she was moving so much yesterday," He consoled. "It wasn't the baby; it was the girls, Jordan and Ava."  I started to sob...a less loud and dramatic version of what I had awakened from. "What happened??" "Some creeper took our girls away from me. I wasn't watching. One minute they were there and the next they were gone." Jim's arms were around me, but it didn't matter. I still felt the guilt burning a pit in my stomach. My throat felt like a stone was lodged in it. "It was only a dream. Thank God it was only a dream." I muttered. But it didn't feel like a dream. I physically felt like I no longer had my girls, I no longer knew where they were and I felt like I wouldn't be getting them back.  I had to keep telling myself that it was a dream, focusing to slow my breathing, wiping away the tears that were stinging my eyes.  I leapt from the bed and into the girls' room. They were peacefully sleeping, safely, soundly. I touched them both to make sure they were real.

Back in bed, I couldn't, did not want to, go back to sleep. Jim suggested, "Go get on your blog. Read your book" He held me until his breathing became slow and even again.  I picked up my book and was thankful to have the diversion.  By 6:00am I felt better. The book took my mind off of everything.  I eventually fell back into a dreamless sleep.

Later that morning, Ava came into the bedroom, excited to see her dad (and me) and happy to get the day started.  Jordan followed behind a little later. I lay with them both snuggled at my side, holding them, kissing their hair, telling them each that I love them, thanking God that I have them, and praying for the strength and guidance to lead them through this jungle we live in.  Asking for His protection.

Olivia slept in this morning, but she got her hugs and kisses too. 

Even though I know it was a dream I could feel the pain, and the guilt, that loosing them would cause.  Mom's need eyes all around and I keep thinking to myself:  How many times have I taken my eyes off of them for a second or been so consumed with something else (that isn't important) and didn't even know where they were?  I think I sometimes take their safety for granted.  But of course, with anything, there has to be a balance. The problem is, where do you strike the balance between safety and over protective sheltering?

Thursday, March 25, 2010

I.D. Is Officially Scared of The Toothfairy.

He asked that she not come to the house tonight.

That is a text message I received from my sister regarding my nephew (who must have lost his first tooth). I haven't gotten the whole story yet, she is supposed to call me today with the details. After I made a mental note and plopped the toothfairy down next to Michael Jackson ala Thriller Video in the pile that makes up my nephew's fears I got to thinking about childhood fears...

I had a few of my own that I can remember clearly. One still hangs on today. I wouldn't say that I am fearful of it anymore, but it still "gives me the creeps" as my daughter Jordan would say.

Fear #1 Fear of being physically harmed by a "body snatcher." Meaning, a body snatcher comes, takes over the body of a loved one, unbeknownst to me, and then loved one begins prodding me with a stick or otherwise abusing me. This is terrifying. I know that abuse happens in our world. Thankfully I've not been abused by a loved one. What a terrifying experience though right?

Fear #2 This one is very hard to describe. It's fear of a particular facial expression. It's an expression rarely seen in real life. It is a look of bugged out happiness. Artificial happiness, if you will. All I see is a close up of a face (usually Male); the face is expressionless and then all of a sudden will begin to grin a crazy, toothy, over exaggerated smile while widening its eyes to the point of bugging out. I don't know where this fear came from. This is the one that stays with me and still creeps me out. A few years ago there was a cereal commercial (although I might have completely blocked out the actual product) like this: It's shot in Black and White. Close up on a sleepy, droopy faced man in his late 40's early 50's. He takes a bite of cereal (or something) and instantly his expression changes to the one I described above. I can't stand it. I'm getting goosebumps just typing about it!

Fear #3.  A completely irrational one that entered around middle school age and followed me through high school. It is a fear of being shot in the buttocks (that body part specifically) with an arrow or bullet that has been trained to hit me from my bedroom window as I lay helplessly in my bed sleeping on my stomach, or about to fall asleep in this same position. Now I know a shot to the buttocks is rarely, if ever, fatal...but this fear caused me to always have to cover my ass with something while sleeping. Usually on a hot night a sheet would suffice. Again, I know that a sheet would not stop the penetrating effects of an arrow or bullet, but this is irrational fearful logic we are talking about. Thankfully this doesn't bother me anymore...but I think it's because I sleep on the second floor and an intruder is less likely to scale my house with a bow and arrow, or a gun and shoot me from the window!

Despite these irrational fears, I've grown up to be a fairly well adjusted adult. But sometimes, and I hope I'm not alone, I look at my little girls' fears and just wonder...is this normal??

Here's a list of their fears (to my knowledge):

Olivia, my youngest, at over 2 1/2, has a fear of Tigers (really I think it's Lions, but she confuses the two). She will often come over to me and will whisper, "There's a Tiger in our house." Her eyes will get big and her lips will pucker into the tiniest "O" as she searches my face for the proper response. There aren't any tigers in our house, I will say. Usually I whisper back. Sometimes she will let out a scream and run around the house. Sometimes she will tell me that "Kingston is a Tiger". Kingston is our dog. He isn't a tiger. I will say.
This is our dog. He doesn't even look like a Tiger, or a Lion, and Olivia is not in the least bit afraid of him for that matter. So I'm not sure what's going on here.  Really I think she just likes to see the reaction she gets. If you could see the face she makes...really it's too cute for words.

Ava, my spunky 4 year old, isn't afraid of too much.  She says she's afraid of the dark, but I don't buy it. I think she just says that she is afraid of the dark because she thinks she is supposed to be afraid of something and she thinks it will get her out of doing things.  Ava, please go throw this tissue into the garbage can in the kitchen.  Ava, But it is DARK in there.  And she will ball her fists and press them up to her chin with the "look" of fear on her face. Ava, It's been a while since you made a trip to the potty...get upstairs and go. Same reaction from Ava. Ava isn't scared, I assure you.  If there's one thing I've learned it is that Ava isn't scared. She is a little lazy. She is very good at making excuses and manipulating others into doing things for her that she herself doesn't want to do.   One truly fearful reaction that I witnessed from Ava was when she freaked out because Jordan told her that there was a spider crawling on her. I didn't see the spider, but I did see the overblown, fearful panic and tantrum that resulted.  There was no calming her, no rationalizing with her. Ava was officially scared. 

Jordan, My sensitive 6 year old, has one fear in particular that I just can't figure out.  Jordan has never been an animal lover.  We've had a dog all of her life--Reagan, a fluffy white American Eskimo, and after Reagan passed we got Kingston, a boxer.  We've also had a myriad of fish.  She merely tolerates these pets. She was fearful of Kingston when he was a pup...the puppy energy and jumping up, she wasn't a fan. Now that he is a big baby (see above picture) at 2 yrs old (people years), she will gingerly pet him. But basically she goes about her day without paying too much attention to him.  She is very skittish around animals of any kind but the bain of her existance? Birds. Avoids them at the pet store. Covers her ears to the sound of squawking or clucking. Cowers in fear at the faintest ruffling of feathers...and if the bird flutters...she can't handle it.  

When she was 2 we went for lunch at MickyD's one day and decided to sit outside in the play area to eat. Mistake number one. Mistake number two was not noticing the errant french fry hit the floor. Immediately, a flock of happy little chickadees made their entrance and Jordan was very afraid as they fluttered at our feet fighting over the fry. And her fear was born, and grew...

When she was 4, we went on a trip to the outer banks and decided to eat at Sonic one day. HUGE mistake.  Seagulls love to hang out at Sonic and they are not shy about making there presence known. A large white/gray bird about four feet from our table let out a gullish cry and Jordan let out a cry of her own. This was straight out of Halloween or something. The most high pitched blood curdling scream I have heard in real life. 

At this point, she will tolerate robins or chickadees or grackles in the yard. Usually, this is when she loves our dog, she will sic Kingston on them. He will bound playfully into the yard and the birds will flap away creating a safe and happy haven.  Her fear seems to be focussing itself in on Pigeons--Rock Pigeons--the gray ones that look more like doves than their green irradescent-headed cousins.  The problem with the pigeons is their herky jerky motions, and also their sound.  Jordan always covers her ears in the presence of birds AND WHENEVER she is afraid. She doesn't clutch her heart, she doesn't cover her mouth (what I feel are normal reactions to fear)...she covers her ears.  It's because of the sound.  When a Rock Pigeon flies away it makes a squeaky sound that corresponds with its wings beating...It kind of sounds like the wings need oiled.  I guess that's the best way to describe it.  She hates that sound.

Birds in cages, or glass cases, no better. I've told her a million times that they can't get out, they are more afraid of her than she is of them...but the best she will do is stand three feet away, hiding behind my back.  I try to expose her to birds. She is not going to get away from them!! I don't force her, but I do want to expose her to them so she doesn't act like a freak about them in public. Things have gotten better.  Although the other day there was a Rock Pigeon in the front yard when we pulled up in the van and she wouldn't get out until I got out and shooed it away.  I didn't even see the damn thing, but I knew it would fly when I got close.

The irony in the situation is that when you ask her what her favorite animal is she will say "a Flamingo."  But not because it's a bird, because it is PINK. And my girl loves her pink. 

Sorry for the lengthy blog...I do have the tendancy to do that don't I?  When I pick a topic I usually have a lot to say...All this, to get to my question for you:  What are your fears? Do your kids have any strange fears? How do you deal with fear, your own, or your kid's?

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

The Magic of the Seashell: One Mom's Triumph.

Okay...a little background first: I don't like to cook anymore. I used to--before I had kids. I am NOT the mom who doubles as a short order cook, meaning I don't cook something for my husband and me and something else for the kids. The most I will do is change up what we are having in degrees if I know that one or another doesn't like it. For example, when I am making soft tacos I will take a few of the soft taco shells and whip up some quesadillas for the girls because they turn their nose up at tacos.

They turn their nose up to a lot of things. I hear a lot of Ew gross! or I don't like this or Do I HAVE to eat this? And nightly the dinner table becomes a boardroom bargaining table:

Just take three bites, Me or Jim.
How about two? The kids.

If I drink all of my milk do I have to finish dinner? The kids.
If you don't eat, there will be no snack tonight! Us.

Sometimes for some reason when suggesting bites, my middle daughter, Ava will come back with a higher number than we originally posed:
Two bites, Ave.
How about FIVE? She asks
OKAY!? At 4 years old the concept of numbers is just beginning to develop for her and we do take advantage of that.

Gone are the days when my husband would wolf down a meal and ask for seconds. Good dinner, Hon! He'd say between bites. Now, all I have to do is look around the table to see how successful my meal is. My husband, wonderful man that he is, will always finish his plate...even choke down a few veggies so that he can be a good example. But if I fish for a compliment, like say aloud Yum....I think that was a good dinner. He'll give me a look, and then I watch his eyes rest for a second on each of my girls half finished plates. It was good, Babe. He'll reassure me. Yeah, right! Sigh. This is why I hate to cook anymore.

The only thing that keeps me going is knowing that someday my kids will be like me: trying new things and actually liking to eat. But for now, their fairly new taste buds can't take much more flavor than the tang of ketchup, the creaminess of ranch dressing, the puckering of dill pickly-ness, and the smooth velvety-ness of cheese. Yes, it seems my kids will only eat condiments.

Until now....

I think we've found a little trick to getting them to eat:

Yesterday, while on the couch watching the news, the clock sped along coldly to the dinner hour. The daily dreaded question arrived. Ava perched herself at the top of the steps with her little head over the rail and asked. What's for dinner? I don't know why they ask this question every day, they are NEVER happy with the answer...and my misery begins before dinner even hits the table.

Tonight I had a feeling that my answer might be well received:

Well, We are having Seashells. Me
Seashells? Her
Yes, seashells. Me
Real seashells? Her
Yes, real seashells...stuffed with scallops and shrimp. Me

I mumbled the last part. It didn't matter. Ava raced upstairs.
JORDIE, She shouted, WE'RE HAVING SEASHELLS FOR DINNER!
Little running footsteps upstairs.
Jordan appears.
Are we having seashells for dinner? She asks
Yes. Me
Real seashells?
Yes.
Oh, I thought maybe the noodle kind?
Nope, real seashells. Come and look.

Wide eyed, my three little dolls stood with faces pressed to the oven door. I can't see them...
I opened the door and there they were! Immediately the girls jumped up and down and round and round.

We're having SEASHELLS for dinner! Real Seashells!!!!!

I have never seen my girls this excited to get to the table. All three of them. I looked at my husband. We'll see, I said. He peeked in the oven, We'll see, He said... He didn't seem convinced.

So earlier that day at the grocery store, I found a sale in the frozen food section in the fish department. As I pulled the BOGO stuffed scallops out of the market freezer, my hand felt a magical tingle. What IS this? I thought. It looked like a lump, much like a crab cake, sitting on top of a perfect half shell--A beautiful scallop shell to be exact. 9 shells in a package, and I could get two for a very cheap price. I'll take them! I thought. Pop'em in the oven for 30 minutes and voila! Dinner. Easy. Maybe not delicious--they looked OKAY...I knew I MIGHT get points for the shell and so I decided to use that to my advantage.

This product exceeded my expectations. As I brought the piping hot shells to the table, a girly chorus of OOOOH! AAAAAH! rose up. We barely got through the prayer without them picking from the shells like the little birds they are.

The talk of dinner that night was all about the seashells and each child picked their shell clean of the meat (or whatever it actually was) nestled inside the shell. To me, it tasted like a not so yummy version of a crab cake...but whatever! I noticed them also eating the side dishes. What is going on here??

I could not stop laughing. I could barely eat my own dinner because I was laughing and laughing and laughing. Now this is that silent, I don't want anyone to see me laughing kind of laugh that if you ever experienced it, you know is very difficult to stop. Tears began to well from my eyes. I covered my face in a dish towel, my body shaking. Every comment from my children raving about these "seashells" brought on a new wave of body wracking laughter. I could not believe it! The stuff did not taste great, but the magic of the seashells was working! I laughed straight through the dinner hour. I laughed in disbelief. I laughed in happiness. I laughed at the true absurdity of it all.

My husband looked at me knowingly. We need to serve ALL of our dinners on seashells! Can you imagine it?

What's for dinner?
Spaghetti, on a seashell.

What's for dinner?
Steak, on a seashell.

What's for dinner?
Chicken, on a seashell.

I think I could even serve tacos to them...if they were on a seashell.

Anyway, I wanted to share my first triumphant dinner experience in months with all of you!

My husband DID painstakingly hand wash the shells and give them to the girls for "a collection." They are now tucked safely into a decorative box that holds Jordan's treasures. I might sneak them out the next time I'm serving something that I know they hate.

Maybe there's some magic left in them!

Friday, February 19, 2010

Look Mom, I'm Famous!

I had to share because my girls get the first few seconds of their 15 minutes of fame. A pic of them in the snow has made it to grace the homepage of their school's website! And they look awfully cute, if I do say so myself!

Here's the link: http://www.mqaschool.org

In other news: I was hit hard by the "bug" on Wednesday with Jim following behind yesterday morning. I had a doctors appointment Wednesday morning and somehow the thing didn't hit me until after I was at home...but unfortunately I'm sure I spread my germs rampantly through the office. Sorry, Dr. Hazel!

At the doctors' office I nervously giggled through my weigh in. I knew it would be bad, what with the winter house arrest. (All I did was eat.) I gained 9 pounds in 4 weeks. OUCH! I know some people who only gained 12 pounds during their entire pregnancy!!!! Well, the bug helped me to shed 5 pounds over night and my stomach still feels too little to really pig out...so I'm just going to ease back into it...and maybe by my next appointment in three weeks things won't be so abysmal.

Also, I gave up Facebook for lent! So far so good...but then again, we've all been too sick for me to be concerned about every one's status updates! I can still get posts to my wall and messages through my e-mail, so it isn't a complete withdrawal, but it's better than nothing! And I'm sure I will have saved myself lots of time. Here's hoping that I can parlay that extra time into a few finished scrapbook pages, or a cleaner house! We'll see.

Anyway, I'm sure I'll be blogging more frequently this month which won't be a bad thing either. Maybe I'll even change up my layout...A friend has offered to help, so I will perhaps take her up on it. Thanks, Janene! And to show my appreciation I'll plug her blog too! You can visit her at: http://imperfectionperfectly.blogspot.com

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